notes on process
now is the time to begin, according to goethe's famous aphorism, invoking the powerful forces of initiation. it may be useful to catalog some of the tools you've acquired. do not be exclusive at this point; include everything. for instance, some idiot, possibly your mother, told you to "make lemonade out of lemons" or some such bullshit. include this on the list. [better make a list. yellow legal pad and a 25 cent bic ballpoint, the white shelled kind they sell in bags of 50 that have a medium point, should do the trick. the flow is easy and you can throw them away without feeling bad.] so go to the store and buy a sack of a dozen organic lemons, some natural spring water if you don't have filters at home, and some sucanat. cut up the lemons into flat slices and boil all of them in a large pot with 2 cups of sucanat [or one quarter cup of stevia or similar concentrated natural sweetener] and enough of the purified water to cover the lemons twice over. when the water comes to a boil lower it to a simmer. when you have noticed the level of the liquid having reduced below the top of the lemons, pour it off into a jar. this mixture is, i believe, about 1 cup per gallon of water to make lemonade, put you may adjust this to taste. drink this lemonade constantly. for added enjoyment add a few large sprigs of fresh rosemary to the pitcher.your next assignment is to take the next bullshit aphorism someone told you about getting things done - "rome wasn't built in a day" for example - and go out and get one of those children's pop up books of roman architecture, or make one of your own if you have a coffee table book you don't mind mutilating with an exacto knife, and build rome. get it done in a day. keep it in plain sight of your work area.
next, take another annoying presupposition or bogus truism and execute it in a concretized literal fashion. let's pull another one out of our ass. "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" - that's a nice one. okay. get seven envelopes, seven small pieces of paper, seven stamps, and seven one dollar bills. oh, and one of your nice new white-shelled bic pens. send each dollar bill to a friend or acquaintance with a quick note - "i am sending you this dollar as a magic ritual. no response is necessary. please spend this dollar in any way you see fit." record any reactions or responses, including your own. do this process periodically - monthly, bi-monthly, etc. don't expect a damn thing to happen - simply record any and all reactions or responses, including your own.
finally, take something you've always heard said but never really believed - "good things come to those who wait". if you have a back yard, go out there with a chair and have a seat; otherwise conduct this exercise on a park bench. bring a bag of some kind, paper and pen. you may wish to bring water and snacks as well. sunglasses and a hat might also be required. so the first thing that falls out of the trees or is blown in front of you by the wind, pick up and put in the bag and catalog it on your note pad - a leaf. a twig. a feather. a dead mole. a bird turd. a piece of trash. anything that falls or blows or arrives physically in some way: collect it. catalog it. we will use these items in a later exercise. wait for as long as possible while collecting and cataloging these "good things". if you wish, also note your own personal reactions and responses to this exercise, including conversations with passers-by wondering what the fuck it is you're doing, police officers suggesting you "move along now", etc.
report back to me any results you may have, and watch this space for further instructions.
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